I realize it is not requisite that i write this. Not in the way that it is requisite that I take two subject tests and the APs. The APs! Who even does the APs? Only the people who do the APs do the APs. And I am so not a person who does the APs. Even though 'APs' sounds kinda cool. I actually thought I would do honors in the beginning. I was so innocent and naive. But 'honors' sounds kinda geeky, as opposed to APs. "I did the APs" means "I'm cooler than you". "I'm an honors student" roughly translates into "I'm so smart I'm only semi-human and the only perk to my existence is that I live in the fanciest building on campus". And sometimes, even if you DO create alternative to plastic in your free time and advocate Linux (come ON. It's called windows?) you still don't get the best dorms. I mean have you ever heard of an honors student in suite style? Sometimes you have to live with your professors. Which wouldn't be so bad if you were like, a C-, but if you're doing honors it means that your professors are even less human than you are and are also probably Nobel Prize winners and speak in morse code. Which means interaction with them is strictly banned socially. Not that honors students follow social norms. Though when you're busy cloning fruit flies on your side of the dorm room you probably don't have the time to commit a faux pas. And if you did, none of the other fruit-fly-cloning aliens would notice anyway. What a way to live. People who are smart enough to do honors should just...move to Mars and blow each other up, and make life easier for all of us. Not that the rest of us aren't smart! It's just, not everybody loves calculus. But the plastics probably research alternatives to carbs. Probably. And I read Lemony Snicket. Just because he keeps explaining words like 'gentle' and 'high pitched' doesn't mean his books aren't intellectual(and they totally ruined it with that movie). They're cryptic. They require a certain depth to be understood. A depth that I was born with, but which you probably don't have. Don't fret. You're probably bereft of many of my finer qualities.
